At just under three million inhabitants, Toronto is a tiny city.
At 5PM every day the skyscrapers leaks commuters towards Union station, banishing them back to the "GTA", and forcing those of us who actually sleep in the downtown bubble to bump into strangers with familiar faces. Even in a city of three million, we all know the same people.
This hit me today as I was downing sesame chicken with a friend on a "business" lunch date and swapping horror stories of our most recent social mishaps.
Once we got past our mutual friends not-so-secret sex lives and the layoffs hitting our workplaces, the talk turned to a certain socialite's slimy side-kick.
The line tried on me: "Do you work in retail?", which translates roughly to "I used to eat New York Fries in the mall and watch you from afar".
My comrade wasn't so lucky, receiving a swift hand towards a private body part in a very public place.
After enduring awkward come-ons in isolation, we came to the realization we'd both been macked on by the same downtown dweller. ("The one with the really long face?", "Yes! Exactly!!")
I think it's time to move, or get a new dating pool. At this point, I'm considering lesbians an option.
Any takers ladies?
6 comments:
time to invest in a strap-on
if all else fails for both of us, i promise to read to you and make you hot cocoa in a platonic symbiotic relationship...good lord, i hope it never comes to that.
I kind of hope it does come to that, and soon.
...i got a new haircut today.
...you'll see it.
...i might be an option for you, now.
i'm afraid that even after a conversion to lesbianism, if we started dating it wouldn't last very long as i simply cannot handle not being the better looking one in the relationship.
your good looks make so many things impossible.
I am sooo intrigued as to whom this sidekick may be ... I have been groped in public, maybe I too have been a victim then again, maybe I am the sidekick ... who knows.
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