Monday, January 19, 2009

If our own lives were more interesting, we wouldn't need television.

We turn on the television to disappear into a world of fantasy, forty minutes at a time. Until the credits roll we get to pretend we're as slick as Jack Bauer, as stylish as Carrie Bradshaw and as clever as Tina Fey. But when you're over-worked, under-paid and facing a recession; do you really want to be reminded that, compared to the tiny people living inside your TV set, you're, well, poor?

The middle-class heros of TV past (think Angela Chase, DJ Tanner and Kevin Arnold) have all but disappeared, making way for trust fund socialites and "real"ity TV. If you're staying at home trying to forget that your pockets aren't full of paper, here are a few shows to avoid when you flick on the tube.

Californication- The life of an out-of-work writer has never been so glamorous as on this show. Hank Moody's monthly budget for cigarettes is probably more than your annual income. Plus he drives a nicer car than you, has a better sex life and is much, much more successful than you... even if his current job title is "blogger" (and let me tell you, blogging doesn't pay the bills.)

Gossip Girl- For those of you who watch Gossip Girl religiously but skip the news, I hate to break it to you, but... New York is in some serious economic trouble. Even Upper East Side "It" girls are being forced to cut back on their Saks shopping sprees, thanks to their fathers shrinking stock portfolios. So as you're sucking back a seven dollar bottle of sparkling wine and watching "B" and "S" brunch, let the dream die ladies. Your not a Waldorf and you (probably) never will be.

The City- After indulging in one full episode and three online re-caps, I'm still entirely unsure of what exactly it is that Whitney Port does. She works at Diane Von Furstenberg, but doesn't do any work, has friends with whom she isn't yet friendly and watches men fight over her; but they never, you know, punch each other or anything. Though I'm still not clear on what she does, I know what she doesn't do: budget. The clothes, hair, make-up and parties are all paid for by a daddy most of us will never have: Father MTV.

Entourage- Now here is a storyline everyone can relate to. An "actor" who spends most of his time doing peyote in the desert and buying his friends cars. Forgive those of us who didn't spend the '90s rapping in the funky bunch, starring in Boogie Nights and dropping our drawers for Calvin Klein.We're a tad bit jealous. No one is buying us a car, or, well anything.

With that in mind, I'm off to take the subway too an evening of Monday night television viewing with friends. Happy Watching.

6 comments:

Derek Kreindler said...

And then there's Mad Men. The way things should be.

Russless said...

You're spot on Derek Kreindler.

Vaneska said...

you don't need money to live an interesting life.

also, have you noticed reality tv is trying really hard to resemble tv tv lately?

liza101 said...

and vise versa, tv is trying to mimic the reality show(s) style. Have you seen the clearasil ad? What's sad to me is that i love all those shows. terrible

extraordinary machine said...

Three online re-caps of The City? I gave up after one episode too, and Andrew Chipman's blog provides me with in-depth-enough episode re-caps that I feel as though I've seen the whole season.

Alex said...

Mad men!